Yeah, y'all know all about remote work. You punch a couple of keys every now and then, do that for a few hours, you're done. Nothing better.

Somewhere along the line bosses started monitoring their remote workers' computers to make sure they were actually at their desks. So workers got crafty, inventing lots of clever devices to simulate work activity. Some of them are pretty basic ...

... while others are, shall we say, more creative:

But in either case, as we near half a decade of widespread remote work, bosses are getting more strict about it:

The rise of remote work and, in turn, employee-monitoring software sparked a boom in mouse and keyboard jigglers and other hacks to help staffers fake computer activity — often so they can step away to do laundry or a school pickup.

Now some companies are cracking down on the subterfuge, deploying tools that can better spot the phony busywork.

Most lately, Wells Fargo revealed that it had fired several employees "for allegedly simulating keyboard activity to create the 'impression of active work.'"

The methods used for detecting the subterfuge have been around for a while, but unsurprisingly they're getting smarter.

These systems, which track how active workers are at their computers, have long been able to detect some installed software or extra hardware.

More of these software systems, such as Teramind and Hubstaff, now also use machine-learning tools that can identify repetitive cursor movements or irregular patterns in someone's computer activity. In addition, some worker-monitoring software can randomly scrape screen images to check whether screen activity is changing as the computer mouse moves.

I don't know about you, but to me the whole thing seems sort of ...

I mean, of course employers have a right to dictate the terms of employment however they see fit. But it seems like the overall goal should be not "activity" but productivity, right?

If employees are getting their work done well and in a timely fashion, in other words, then what does it matter if they "step away to do laundry or a school pickup?" Who's complaining, in other words, as long as the work gets done?

This hasn't gone unobserved in the work world, mind you:

Gabrielle Judge, a career influencer who goes by Antiwork Girl Boss on social media, provides links to a few mouse jigglers on her Amazon Storefront. She thinks they're useful when remote workers finish up early or need to take care of an errand, but says they should be used wisely.

Ultimately, she advises workers to ask themselves why they need to use a mouse jiggler in the first place. Often, it's a sign they're in a workplace that values busy-ness over actual output.

Bottom line: That head massager you've got jiggling your mouse ain't gonna cut it anymore!

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