This is not satire. The American Heart Association is literally down in Texas lobbying for soda and candy to remain available to those using food stamps.
Senate Bill 379 removes energy drinks, sweetened drinks, candy, potato/corn chips, cookies, and soda from the list of items that can be purchased with SNAP benefits.
Why would the American Heart Association be against this?
Could it have anything to do with the funding the AHA has received from Coke and Pepsi? Could it have to do with the money they've received from Kellogg's? Or maybe it's the pharmaceutical companies who fund the AHA?
The American Heart Association knows sugar leads to obesity and obesity exacerbates heart disease (the number one cause of death in America), yet here they are fighting for sugar!
The American Heart Association also, in the late 1900s, pressured our fast-food industry to move away from tallow and toward seed oils.
The simple fact that the American Heart Association would fight against legislation which removes junk food from poverty-stricken people's diets is beyond parody.
The Babylon Bee can't compete with reality anymore!
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